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Monday, January 22nd, 2001
1:07p - I don't want you to be alone down there...
Depression kind of rocks sometimes.

current mood: chipper

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2:16p - I love elderly women
I just helped my mom with an elderly woman today. She was new in my mom' foster home. She had a stroke as we helped her. It was insanely depressing watching her switch from perfectly capable of walking on her own to watching her as she had a stroke and not be able to walk on her own.

It made me go visit with some of the other women that live in this home. From Mary Loiuse, an overweight ex-WW2 nurse who once took my stitches out for me, to Peroska, a much younger victim of perscitution in Bosnia, suffering from post-war schiztohprenia. And then there's Thelma...nearly 100 years old, and still 10 times as bright as I will ever be.

I don't know what to do other than cry.

current mood: touched

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2:28p - Fucking fuck
I've dealt with such things for 15 years of my life
living in this house that is also a foster home
seeing old women I grow friendships with die
when I turned about 14 I stopped talking to them
because I was sick of seeing my friends die
but now I feel the need to talk to them
because there's so much to learn
but there's like
no timer to count how long it is until they go fucking elderly
and I can't talk to them anymore
fuck my parent's for putting me through this

current mood: stressed

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I am going to get a job with Loaves and Fishes.

The elderly deserve better than this.

They need someone to talk to.


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